Nah, you guessed it, I was pulling your leg, nothing exciting happening here. Nothing to see. Move along now.
Sometimes I get very restless. Sometimes, and you may have noticed, I find it very hard to confine myself to the realms of normality. You see, I am odd, sometimes very odd. I know that I am odd because people close to me tell me that I am odd. I am aware of my oddness and I recognise it in others. 'It takes a weirdo to spot a weirdo' is a quote that may have been used before, it may not have been, but I think there is some truth in it. However, back to oddness. In fact strictly speaking we are all odd, because we are all different ('I'm not' came the cry from the back) and as we are all different, we are all 'odd'. I suppose it is just the differing amounts of 'oddness' that sets some apart from others as being, well, odd.
But not only do I acknowledge that I am odd, I enjoy being odd. The one thing I hope I never do is turn into a sheep. I'm not talking about a literal metamorphasis, no I mean 'sheep' as in a follower. No offence meant to sheep or sheep owners or indeed shepherds but sheep are reknowned for following each other about without questioning why. In fact the only time sheep don't follow each other about is if they have their heads stuck in a fence, which they frequently do or if they're dead and they do that pretty frequently too believe me, I live on a sheep farm and I smell the 'knacker wagon' every time it trundles past. I know, they're sheep, they don't question anything but sometimes I see that sheep mentality too much in people. I know to a certain extent we follow each other in a conventional sense. We all wear clothes and go to work and have weekends off, well some people do. We all eat at conventional times, sleep at roughly the same time and well, just do things in general harmony. Apart from criminals and people who are generally anti-social that is, but I'll stop this train of thought straight away or this will turn into a right old sweary rant.
Anyway some people follow each other to a 'sheeplike' extent which is behaviour I find hard to understand. I can't stand it, it makes me want to shout and scream and jump up and down...............but only if no-one else is doing that.
One thing that really annoys me is 'theme weeks'. Not long ago it was 'National sausage week'. Well who the hell decided that it should be national sausage week? No one asked me if I wanted a national sausage week. No one asked if I minded. But someone somewhere decided that the 'sheep' needed to eat some more bangers and generally celebrate everything and anything 'sausage'. Well, and I know I am not alone, not alone by a long way, I didn't. My sausage consumption remained the same. In fact I probably ate less sausages as a result of national bloody sausage week just to prove my point. The forthcoming Royal Wedding is another case in point. Many, many people are organising street parties. Why? Is it really that important? No offence to Prince William and his bride to be but, really, a street party? Or is this just an excuse to try and meet the neighbours that they have never spoken to?
I don't wish to poo poo things such as street parties, by all means go ahead and have one. I hope the sun shines and you get out of it whatever you want, I hope you have a smashing time in fact. I will not be going to a street party. I don't live in a street for starters, but I won't be attending a farm party either. Miserable git I hear you suggest? No, just odd. It's that simple.
In the meantime here is a picture of a rather splendid looking alpaca and by virtue of his general splendidness, he's odd too.